Looking for a Magic Show in Southern California? Thom Bliss amazes children, adults and families in San Bernardino County, Riverside County and throughout Southern California with his phenomenal magic and amuses them with his squeaky clean humor. Thom Bliss is a magician, children's entertainer, balloon twister, balloon artist, clean comic, and gospel magician. He entertains indoors and outdoors at children's parties, birthdays, adult parties, schools, churches, libraries, civic clubs, senior centers, and businesses in Orange county, Los Angeles county, and throughout southern California. You can bring Thom Bliss and all the mystery and mirth of a live comedy magic show to your living room, backyard, school, church, library, senior center, civic club, or business. And it may cost less than you think ... a lot less! 

MagiComedian
Thom Bliss
& Pam
Clean
Jokes
from the
files of
Thom Bliss

Caution: Do Not Read this if You've Already Had Enough Laughs Today

 

My wife wanted me to take her some place expensive. So we went to the gas station. ... Made a down payment on a tank of gas.



You know you need to get to church more often when you walk in the front door of your own church and a complete stranger approaches you, introduces himself ... then asks you to sign the visitors’ book!


Disgruntled diner: I was at your restaurant yesterday and enjoyed one item so much that I came back and ordered it again today. But it doesn’t taste at all the same today. 

Restaurant manager: I’m very sorry, sir. What did you order? Disgruntled customer: The soup de jour.


Here’s one for those of who think you're philosophers: If a man says something in the middle of a forest, and no women are around to hear him, is he still wrong?




Now here’s one for the academic philosophers: It seems there was this goal-setting specialist, overly-influenced by the logical positivists, who got lost while hiking and nearly froze to death. After he was rescued, somebody suggested that next time he should take some matches, or a lighter, so he could start a fire to keep warm. 

He replied, "Oh, I had some matches," he said, "but it would have made no sense to have started a fire."  

"I'm not sure I understand." 

"What I lacked was a thermometer, and without a thermometer, there was no objective way to measure the results."




Teacher: Use ‘district’ in a sentence. 
Junior magician:
I learned dis trick from Thom Bliss.



Some things never change. It was Will Rogers who said, “The trouble with political jokes is that they very often get elected.”
But just in case you think that Will Roger had no respect for our elected official, remember that he also said, “We have the best politicians money can buy.”



A Catholic priest and a Protestant minister were dinning in a restaurant when their friend, a Jewish rabbi, comes in. He looks at the other two and says, “Okay, what’s the joke?”


I wanted to play the violin but I was too high strung.
 
I thought I might make a living playing the organ, but I realized that was just a pipe dream. 

Then I got a job at the frozen juice factory, but I couldn’t concentrate, so I got canned. 

Then I went to work at a grocery store, but I didn’t put much stock into it and ended up getting sacked.
A magician had witnessed a crime and had been called to testify. < Although he had appeared on stage many times, this was a new venue for him, and he had a bout of “stage fright.” So he asked his best friend, another magician, to come to court with him. 

As they were leaving the court room, the friend turned to him and said, “When they asked you your occupation, why did you say, ‘I am the world’s greatest magician?’” 

The first magician replied, “I had to, I was under oath.”

Then his friend said, “But when people hear that the world’s greatest magician testified in court today, people will think it was me.”

Then the first magician said, “Maybe. But when they hear that he was only a witness and not the defendant, they'll know it wasn't you.”



When all is said and done, there’s a lot less done than said!


... And if it weren’t for the last minute, a lot less would get done.



An umpire's association is publishing a new edition of the rules of baseball, just for its members ... It’s in Braille.



You won't find any lawyer jokes here. As a matter of fact, when I graduated from college, I thought about going to law school and becoming a lawyer. In fact, there were only two things that kept me from going to law school ... And both of them were scruples.

Two scruples might not seem like a lot, but I was advised that it was two too many.


My wife loves those on-line auctions. She bought one of those solar powered clothes dryers over the internet. Paid only five dollars, plus twenty dollars for shipping and handling. Turns out it was twenty feet of rope and a dozen clothes pins.


I married my wife for her looks ... but not the ones she’s giving me now!




Maybe I should have married her for her mind ... she's given me so many pieces of it, it's amazing she has any left!


At least my wife is quick to come to my defense. Somebody once asked her, “Does your husband suffer from insanity?” She said, “No, I think he rather enjoys it.”


Thom Bliss MagiComedy. Thom Bliss is a children's and family entertainer, magician, clean comedian, comic, balloon twister, and gospel magician, serving all of southern California, including Riv erside, San Bernardino, Colton, Norco, Palm Springs, Palm Desert, Temecula.

Don't miss the MAGIC!   Don't miss the FUN!
To schedule a show, or for more information, call us at
(714) 539-4259
or click here to send an e-mail.

     Welcome       Magical children's parties       Magic for adults      Balloon sculpture      Church programs      School & library programs      Frequently asked questions      Clean jokes •   FREE Party Planning Guide     Trixie's party store

Party Supplies for All Occasions... click here!

ShindigZ by Stumps - Winter Free Shipping Over $75

Everything Elementary Since 1926



 Service area: MagiComedians Thom Bliss & Pam entertain children, adults and families throughout Riverside County and San Bernardino County, including the following: Aguanga, Anza, Apple Valley, Arrowhead, Bermuda Dunes, Big Bear Lake, Cabazon, Canyon Lake, Cathedral City, Cherry Valley, Chino, Chino Hills, Chiriaco Summit, Coachella, Colton, Corona, Crestline, Cucamonga, Desert Center, Fontana, Gilman Hot Springs, Grand Terrace, Hemet, Hesperia, Highland, Homeland, Idyllwild, Indian Wells, Indio, Joshua Tree, La Quinta, Lake Arrowhead, Lake Elsinore, Lakeview, Loma Linda, Lucerne Valley, Mecca, Menifee, Mira Loma, Montclair, Moreno Valley, Mountain Center, Murrieta, Norco, North Palm Springs, Nuevo, Ontario, Palm Desert, Palm Springs, Parris, Pine Cove, Quail Valley, Rialto, Rancho Cucamonga, Rancho Mirage, Redlands, Riverside, Romoland, Rubidoux, San Bernardino, San Jacinto, Sky Valley, Sun City, Temecula, Thermal, Thousand Palms, Twentynine Palms, Upland, Victorville, Wildomar, Winchester, Wrightwood, Yermo, Yucaipa, and Yucca Valley, California.
     Categories: Birthday party magic, birthday party entertainment, birthday party entertainer, birthday party entertainers, children's entertainer, children's entertainers, children’s birthdays, children's entertainment, kids’ show, kids shows, children's show, children's shows, birthday party, birthday parties, kids parties, parties for kids, magic, magician, magicians, comedy magic, comedy magician, comedy magicians, comedian, comedians, clean comedy, clean comedian, clean comedians, clean comic, clean comics, balloon animals, balloon hats, balloon flowers, magical magic, magical entertainment, gospel magician, gospel magicians, gospel magic, magic with a message, sacred magic, Christian magician, Christian magicians, magic trick, magic tricks, conjuring, conjuror, conjurer, hocus pocus, sleight of hand, sleight of hand artist, sleight-of-hand artist, close-up magic, close-up magician, close-up magicians, party planning, church program, church programs, clean jokes, jokes, humor, family entertainment, family entertainer, family entertainers, fun for the whole family, family-oriented entertainment, family-oriented entertainer, family oriented entertainment.
     Website designed by William Thomblison.
     Entire contents of this website copyright © 2004, 2005, 2006 by Thom Bliss MagiComedy. All rights reserved. 
     This page created or revised 1/05/06
     "Thom Bliss," "Thom Bliss MagiComedy," "Thom Bliss & Trixie," "Thom Bliss & Pam," "Good News MagiComedy," "Southern California's Family Entertainer," and "Wonder & Laughter for the Whole Family" are trademarks of Thom Bliss MagiComedy. The magician & rabbit figure is a trademark of Thom Bliss MagiComedy.     www.thomblissmagic.com


   Southern California Family Entertainer Thom Bliss might have trouble finding his mischievous rabbit, Trixie, but he’ll have no trouble holding the attention of your guests or clients.
 •  Welcome
 •  Magical children's parties
 •  Balloon sculpture
 •  Magic for adults 
 •  Church programs
 •  School & library programs
 •  FREE Party Planning Guide
 •  Frequently Asked Questions
 •  Clean jokes
 •  Links  
 •  Trixie's party store

Don't miss the MAGIC!   Don't miss the FUN!
To schedule a show, or for more information, call us at
(714) 539-4259
or click here to send an e-mail.

   

Thom Bliss answers your questions about his magicomedy shows

Answers to frequently asked questions
(No, we won't tell you how the tricks are done)